overjoyed_logs

Who: Plant Newbie (

rhygret), Plant Senior (

graftage), and a rusting bucket (

lefthandfree)
Where: Root Cell Hidden Compound (Undercity Tunnels)
When: too soon, ~~fake~~ Old Town Official Planters Guild meeting
Summary: Some idiots came up with being part of a plant club to cover up their underground activities and someone decided that that was the Greatest idea and joined in because he direly needs friends. The following are the true, sad events that follow.
Restrictions/Warnings: language? too many plants. Rhys’ desperation

[He doesn’t have to wonder how this came about. It’s plenty obvious that they had to say something to Rhys when he somehow ended up prying his way into what was meant to be a covert meeting of otherwise fairly covert operatives in the Hyperion front. But there has been no tangled web as complicated as this one in all James’ years, which he finds just as hilarious as he finds it delicate. On the bright side, at least Jack isn’t here to make it all even more confusing.

They’re seated at the main work table in the entry of the compound, all on different sides, and before the killjoy sits a couple of his favorite baby plants, Gerald (an aglaonema) and Meredith (a peace lily). Luckily he actually keeps plants in his apartment or the ruse would fall flat far too quickly. Though given how much tension blatantly resides between the other two in the room, James doesn’t know how long it will keep up anyway.]

So.

[Yeah. There’s not a lot of ways to make this any less awkward.]

I guess we should start, uh, giving an update on plant progress since the last meeting and. Then go on into discussing initiation of our newest member.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[This really isn't ideal.]

[He can't believe Rhys bought it. And he can't believe Rhys wanted to join in on their fake club. Now they had to make their fake club a real thing. Not that Steinbeck would mind, given that he's a huge fan of everything green and chlorophyll-filled, but this is going too far.]

[He aims a glare over at the "newest member".]

Not just anybody can be part of this group. [He says, obviously bitter.] Anyways, my plants are doing wonderfully.

[He gestures to his purple streptocarpus and flourishing laceleaf proudly.]

Rhys, have you ever grown a single plant in your life?

[He bets he hasn't.]

[ Wow, the judgment here is real??? Never mind that Rhys joined because he thought it was bogus, and on the odd chance that it wasn't that it would irritate Steinbeck and that was more than enough reason to go through with it. So he sits here now, in...a dank, gross tunnel with an incorrigible monk and his quite frankly bad ass Killjoy of a friend and yeah okay maybe he joined Plant Club for more than just annoying Steinbeck. ]

Uhh, yeah? I mean. Not--not from scratch, it was already flowering and stuff but I didn't kill it. [ SO THAT COUNTS. ]

Well, not killing it is good, right? [Looking at you, John. Because killing is definitely a lot better than. Well. Killing it.] We definitely try to ensure the health of our plants as much as we can, with what we have available.

Prevention too, if it’s applicable... And quarantine if mites become an issue.

For my update, Meredith is a lot happier lately, which I’m glad for. Was worried a bit there when she stopped looking so bright, but it turned out I had her a bit warmer than she likes it.

[He’s pulling shit out of his ass now because there has never been any meetings before this one, really. But he has asked John on his advice before, when it came to upkeep of some of his plants and That One Time Spider Mites Were Being A Fucking Pain In The Ass with Laura, his sweet mint tree. And he does update John from time to time, so. It's kind of not a lie to update John on Meredith's situation...]

How long did you keep it?

A child couldn't kill a plant. That's hardly anything to boast about.

[The updates on Bucky's plants are good, though. Steinbeck nods in approval, happy to hear they're doing well.]

Good, good! Plants like different temperatures like we do, so...I'm glad.

[He beams at Bucky...and then instantly scowls over at Rhys. Sorry, Rhys. He's being terrible as ever.]

I'm guessing he had it, like, less than a week, tops.

Excuse you, I had it for at least a month. [ Before he forgot about it and one of the servants took over caring about it. UNIMPORTANT. What really catches Rhys's attention in all of this isn't Steinbeck's scowl, but-- ]

...Wait, you named your plant?

[There isn’t even any reason to acknowledge Rhys’ answer about how long he kept the plant now. Because Rhys has called into question something James finds unnecessary to even question, and now he is mildly distressed that Rhys would even think such a thing unacceptable when obviously it’s the thing everyone should be doing anyway, even if unspoken.]

...you have something against naming plants?

[Really though? Saying that shit In a ~~fake~~ Plant Club? Rude as hell. James looks to John with a slight furrow in his brow. He doesn't want to say he's upset, but... Well. He likes his plants. What's wrong with naming them?]

They’re important to me too, like my friends. So what if I name them?

Yeah, what if he names them? It helps him be closer to the plant.

[If it's possible for Steinbeck's frown to deepen, it does so - he respects Bucky. He respects that Bucky likes his plants and wants to take care of them. If he wants to name his plants, he can go for it. Besides, it's cute, in it's own way.]

You know what? Bucky, if we want this guy to be in the group, he not only has to prove he can own a plant without killing it, but he'll have to name it, too.

Wh--I wasn't saying it was a bad thing, I wasn't judging you! [ Rhys balks, backtracking quickly. ] I just thought it was an odd...choice is all, but you can do whatever you want??

Didn’t sound like you only thought it was an odd choice, pal. [A bit dejectedly. Rhys, you seemed so reasonable and kinda chill, and then you spring this on a bro... Wow.]

John’s right though. I think part of the trial should include you naming a plant. It’s gotta be a nice, fitting name too. Unfortunately, you’ve ruined your credibility a bit here. We are a club about plants after all. If you don’t care that much about ’em, then maybe you’re in the wrong place.

[Look, he’s given you a fair chance too. It’s not his fault you blew it so fast. ~~But who’s surprised?~~]

See, Bucky agrees with me.

[He almost looks like he's going to preen from how smug he is.]

This is a serious organization, Rhys. You want to join, you have to follow our rules. No ifs, ands, or buts.

[He grins.]

Still want in?

Fine. [ Oh no you don't Steinbeck. You get smug and Rhys is going to take that as a challenge and lean right on in over the table, arms crossed. ]

Not only will I name it, but it's going to be the most well-cared for plant in the Quad. Just watch--two weeks from now you'll be begging to know how great I was looking after it.

I mean— [Look, it doesn’t take a genius to know where this conversation’s going.] Let’s not. Turn this into some kinda competition, guys.

Every plant deserves love and care. It shouldn’t be down to who’s better at it or. Whatever. Just. Try. [That’s directed at Rhys now.] That’s all I’m asking.

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