Lavi Bookman (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
inksplashes) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
overjoyed_logs2017-02-16 03:03 pm
inksplashes) wrote in overjoyed_logs2017-02-16 03:03 pm
Entry tags:
closed | world forgetting by the world forgot
Who: Lavi, Kanda
Where: Various locations
When: ... Various dates!
Summary: Keeping my non-plot stuff in here!
Restrictions/Warnings: We're aiming for cute so expect extreme angst in like five tags.
Where: Various locations
When: ... Various dates!
Summary: Keeping my non-plot stuff in here!
Restrictions/Warnings: We're aiming for cute so expect extreme angst in like five tags.
no subject
--a tenuous meeting of lips and fragile hearts, wanting and demanding for so much more than they can take--
He pushes the confounding visions aside, seeking the petulant frustration of his lack of sleep and decided lack of furry friend to ground him. It's difficult to keep his sense of anger when warm breath washes against his skin and a low voice vibrates throughout his ears, but he's as determined as he is stubborn, and those forces together are nigh unstoppable.
Lavi takes a calming breath, consciously drawn and measured, before attempting a reply. ]
I'm not mad.
[ Careful steps lead them up the now waiting ramp, one hand gripping into the other's wrist, the other curled around a lean side to facilitate the motion. ]
I'm just tired.
[ Though he still sounds fairly accusatory in that. His face softens after a moment, mature enough to concede that a pet isn't in their best interest but not so mature to let it go in entirety.
(When did he start thinking in long-term goals? He won't be here more than a year, possibly less, with the current political climate. A pet is a commitment well past what he can make.)
Leaning away enough to hit the control console beside the ramp, Lavi grumbles to himself, looking down at the man playing torture on his nerves. There's no way Kanda knows of those confusing dreams, so he can't hold it against him, but damn if the proximity isn't making it difficult to concentrate.
A second sigh, heavy and long-suffering, flows past slightly curved lips as he regards Yu sullenly. ]
I didn't even know you could get this drunk. Is there any hokk left in Old Town or did you just crash the economy?
no subject
[Laughing softly at that as they stand beside the console, the sound low and rich, he shifts a little more, enough to step half in front of the other...
And then, quite deliberately, reaches up to drape his other arm over Lavi's other shoulder, lets his body rest more solidly against Lavi's before he closes his eyes on a sigh.
It's a gamble, true... but in this, he just wants to see his partner's reaction. To see if the memory is utterly gone, or just buried beneath a fevered curtain, waiting to be drawn back.
(And if it gives him a chance to breathe in that familiar scent, steal a moment of comfortable warmth under the guide of drunken laziness, he's not above thievery.
Not when others given are still there to haunt both waking hours and dreams alike.)
To this end, he draws a deep breath, sighs it out in a warm breath against flesh as he reaches a hand up to poke the back of Lavi's head.]
Don' lie to me - you're a little mad so... 'm sorry. Idiot.
no subject
Lavi stiffens, his muscles solidifying into stone, arm lifted and held rigid at Yu's back as if he expects the man to fall at any moment. He tries, desperate for an explanation that won't feed into his misconceptions about their relationship, to come up with any other word for this action but hug.
But there's no other descriptor that fits. Yu isn't falling over, he's falling forward, into Lavi, and it's--
Three times as difficult to keep focus for it. Fantasies, half-lifted from burned memories and fevered dreams, interplay across his vision, his body yearning to crumple and fold around his partner even as his mind protests.
(A controlled breath between set teeth, willing himself not to forget his anger and ignore the heat growing between them.
It works, for a moment. It works up until the point that Yu starts slurring and apologizing, and then the threads of irritation loosen and drift away before he can reach for them again.)
This time, the sigh that echoes out from him is soft, the irritated edge of dampened with a note of defeat. The tension leaves him for a moment, the statuesque arm folding neatly around Kanda's ribs while his other hand reaches up to brush back long hair.
He smiles, soft and a little wistful, chin set against temple. ]
Geeze, you're making me feel bad. Fine, I'm a little mad.
[ And you're a lot drunk, he adds mentally, chiding himself for enjoying the fruits of that inebriation as he draws back from the embrace. Grinning a little more ruefully than he intends, he offers in a teasing tone, forgiveness clear but not without its price: ]
But I guess you're a handful enough without adding anything else to the mix. Think you can make it to your room?
no subject
[His indignation at being called a handful would probably be more believable if he hadn't made as face as he'd stepped back, hadn't swayed a little too much for the effort and thrown his hands out to capture a semblance of balance once again.
Sniffing, he cuts a sidelong look at his partner, a glint of triumph in his gaze - and not just because he'd managed to not fall on his ass - but because he'd caught the shift from wary tension to something almost like that night.
A hint of affection in the brush of fingers along his side, the tease of a smile against his forehead.
It's enough to let him know that, even if Lavi never managed to recover those memories, creating similar ones while they're both aware isn't so impossible as he'd thought.
Humming softly to himself, he then scoffs as if accepting a challenge.]
But if you wan'a handful... okay. Challenge accepted. Hm.
[Spinning abruptly on his heel (and almost losing his balance in the process) he grunts and catches himself on the side of the rover before stepping with all the resolute determination that a thoroughly drunken Kanda Yu can manage.]
no subject
(Think not of how cold they seem now, how empty the air and atmosphere feels without the weight and warmth of him; let these thoughts scatter and wait for a safer moment to return, because you've given up on the idea that they'll stay gone for good.)
But what he has always done, it occurs to Lavi, has seldom truly worked for him. Swearing off attachments has not lessened his ability to form them, it has simply made their severing more painful for it. Likewise, telling himself--or indeed, even telling Yu--that he won't intervene in the natural consequences of actions has done little to actually curb such intervention.
It's just a form of denial, a crudely shaped, easily broken, wholly transparent kind of denial.
He steps around the rover, eyebrow raised, his indecision clear. But now it is not a matter of deciding between actions for the sake of duty or the sake of personal attachment--now it's just a choice between whether his sense of humor is more vindictive than his sense of concern.
In the end, his concern wins, announcing itself in the low laughter off his still contained mouth. ]
Yeah, you do that.
[ Accept his challenge, he means. Repositioning himself, he takes ownership of Yu's arm again, pulls it over his shoulders with a weary sound as his other arm finds purchase in a trim side. It's not strictly gentle, this action, but it's not overly rough, either, exerting only as much force as he needs to make his point.
He will carry Yu's drunk ass to bed with little room for negotiation. ]
Tomorrow. You can do that tomorrow and thank the trees I can't record and carry your dumbass at the same time.
no subject
[There's an indignant grunt when he's pulled to Lavi's side, the world shifting rather precariously for a moment. A slow blink and the world settles right side up again, prompts him to turn to glare at his partner as they continue out of the hanger.
Much as everyone assumes Kanda is the stubborn one of the two of them, looking at the set of Lavi's jaw, he's not so certain that's the case. Because for all that Lavi teases, the grip holding him is strong, sure, and (a little) unyielding.
It's nice...
Blinking at that, he shakes his head and draws a deep breath, lets the dizziness jar him out of his senses because even now, some vague part of him relieved that his inebriated state is... probably... enough to cover the sharp spike of want that being this close, that feeling the firm press of a hand at his hip, that seeing the hard line of that jaw elicits.
Impulse is not usually something Kanda has to work to contain, but this walk?
It's going to kill him, long before the copious amounts of alcohol has the chance.]
It is tomorrow. Or today? Mmm... Today.
[Another slow blink as he keeps his gaze turned to the side, watches the corridor slide by, his thoughts trying to drift back to the last time they were so close, though at the opposite end of these halls. Talk about symbolism even he can see.]
Don' regret it when I do. I won't lose.
[Muttered words, barely breathed out, but there's a definite ring of something almost fierce, determined, in the warning.]
no subject
Which is to say that Lavi considers himself something of a communication expert and yet for all his years and studies, he has no freaking clue what Yu is on about.
Drunk Kanda, alas, is not a tongue he's ready to translate without a reference dictionary nearby.
Not that he doesn't try, studying his partner with an askance look that conveys much of his frustrated confusion. It's a blessing in itself, too, because as long as he's trying to decipher exactly what challenge Kanda has accepted and will not lose (to be a handful? He's fairly sure there's a rule against professionals competing--), he's not thinking about the thundering heartbeat in his ears or restrained quiver in his spine.
So he takes this challenge with perhaps more zeal than he normally would, bemused smile still in place when he answers that warning agreeably (though he's still not sure what he's agreeing to, exactly). ]
I'll hold you to that then.
[ He sounds almost sincere, even, and the short nature of the answer almost keeps the laughter from spilling through. It's not quite successful (it never is), and when he glances down to catch Yu's eye, he notices the distinct absence of a meeting gaze.
Humming softly, the fingers at Kanda's side dance lightly in place in a tease as he tilts his head down to bump his nose against Yu's cheek. It makes the walk a little awkward for a moment, but he's never been one to forgo aggravating his partner just because of a silly thing like logistics. ]
Are you mad now? C'mon, I was only joking. Yuuuu. [ Pleading, albeit still somehow laughing. ] Forgive me? Please?
no subject
[He's pretty sure that makes no sense, positive, really, but in his defense he's too busy thinking This proves it. If those bastard Trees are real, they fucking hate me.
Because he can hear the laughter warming Lavi's taunt, feel that hum shiver down his spine before the trace and flicker of fingers against his side.
He tries to ignore that, too, and almost succeeds - but then warm breath teases along his neck and Lavi's face right there, and he can't help the way his body jerks as if to lean closer, hand fisting in the fabric of his partner's jacket, right between his shoulder blades.
You're gonna be the death of me, he thinks with a moment's clarity, even as his face jerks to the side, towards the source of his latest torment.
Noses bump, lips passing tantalizingly close but not quite touching before they brush past each other, before he - in an equally clear moment - purposefully lets his feet stumble, as if balance lost.
His grip tightens a little more in Lavi's jacket as he completes the move, drops his forehead to the curve of his partner's neck with a soft curse and a prayer to any god or overgrown shrubbery for a reprieve, before he does something completely and utterly reckless.]
Bastard! You're gonna make me fall. Imma take you with me though.
no subject
It's endearing, if mildly frustrating, and there can be no more succinct summary of his emotions up to this point. First he's stirred from his sleep to discover Yu missing (so rare that he falls asleep early or first), and then he's summoned to retrieve the man in question after an evident night of debauchery.
That, of course, had been the frustrating parts to now. The more endearing aspects are fresher, a recent arrival to the course of the night. The warm, buzzing distraction of Yu's body leaned into his--the tease of breath on his neck stirring up senses he's desperate to quell and answer simultaneously.
These things, albeit frustrating in their own right, are among the perks of this strange journey.
Lavi is given precious little time to enjoy or reflect on these thoughts before the world shifts.
At first, the spasm felt beneath his hand and the subsequent twist into him is received as just another aspect of this strangely uncoordinated creature. He anticipates it, choreographs the completion of the movement before it's come to pass, and still he--
Gets it completely, utterly wrong, breath catching in his throat, lips parted slightly as if in protest or yielding to the abrupt change of position. Dreams press to his mind, scattered images of moments like these interlacing in the present. If he just leaned forward that little bit more, he could..could..
Could what? Carry out decisions he's fully cognizant of being entirely wrong and foolish? Break the precious balance of their friendship?
He's caught off guard, blissfully and gratefully so, as Yu stumbles instead, a mix of absolute thankfulness and self-loathing washing over him as he releases that breath and reaches to catch on the wall. Yu isn't particularly heavy, but he's also fairly close to Lavi's height, so the threat issued is one he believes--if he's not mindful, they're both going to end up falling down.
Despite--or perhaps even because of--internal berating, Lavi manages to keep himself from falling prey to the misstep, arm tightening that much more around Yu as he stabilizes them.
Just a few more steps. That's all he has to do before he can deposit Yu on his bed and call the night done between them. ]
Easy, easy. We're almost there.
[ He's not sure who he's reassuring at that point, but it doesn't matter, because he's telling the truth. Just a few more steps and he motions the door panel to Yu's room open, belatedly realizing he's yet to loosen his grip since their near fall. ]
Here we are. C'mon, I'll help you change. I'm starting to get buzzed off the fumes coming off you.
[ ..yeah he's not going to realize the folly of that until it's too late, but at least his temporary ignorance lets him keep steady as he turns them around to drop Yu back first on the not-at-all made bed. ]
no subject
(That it gives him the chance to simply close his eyes and breathe deep the familiar scent, allows him a few moments of stolen intimacy, their slightly out of pace steps much like an unfamiliar dance, is simply a bonus.)
That is, until Lavi oh so helpfully offers to help him change.
Immediately, his mind supplies him with the memory of Lavi's fingertips sliding around his sides, slipping beneath his shirt... provides fuel to imagine those same hands slipping apart buttons, prying apart a belt--
Fuck.Fuck.I'm so fuckin'-- Shit. Get it together, idiot. He's gonna see...
Kanda (mostly) manages to push the images aside, to suppress a shudder and a groan at that, a shiver of pure anticipation before he finds himself rather unceremoniously dumped onto an annoyingly messy bed. The world spins disarmingly and he has to snap a hand out to the side, fingers curling, twisting, in the bedding beside him in a futile attempt to dispel the dizzying sensation.
It's a loosing battle, however, and so he lets out a huff of a breath as he falls back in the bed, eyes nearly shut as he turns his head, focuses on keeping the edge of the bed in sight.
That is, after all, worlds easier than focusing on his partner's... everything... just then.]
...Can sleep like this. 'S fine.
no subject
Yeah, well, I can't sleep like this.
[ And since he's more or less started staking his claim on the land that is Yu's bedroom, the bed is equally his to mandate or not make as he pleases. He can sleep through a lot, but trying to drift off into sweet dreams while laying next to a hokk distillery in human form?
Even he's not that good.
Capturing one of Kanda's ankles, he huffs, deftly plucking at the tied threads of laces. At least Kanda wears shorter boots than him so this process shouldn't be overly difficult if he can coax some concentration out of his partner.
He still hasn't started thinking about the ramifications or where this could lead, entirely too tired to throw himself into the frenzy of analytics just yet. Boot tossed haphazardly somewhere off to the side (where Kanda has thankfully not yet noticed a nest of papers beginning), he moves to the opposite ankle, clicking his tongue in light disapproval. ]
You could've called if you were gonna be out this late. I wouldn't have gone to sleep so early.
[ ...totally a thing that platonic partners do, right? And the bristling, that's normal too.
Huff. Again. (Okay, he's still mad.) ]
no subject
So rather than protest the help, he waits somewhat patiently, watches nimble fingers tease laces apart before his feet are given freedom and he can wriggle his toes with a contented almost-sigh. More like a pleasantly controlled breath.
Really. ]
Didn't mean to. Fucking trees can that woman drink.
[He wasn't sure if it's the type of nanites she has, or some other 'modification' he's not aware of yet, but she'd barely seemed to hit buzzed all evening - and he'd lost track of the number of bars several hours earlier.
So for him to admit that?
The woman had to have alcohol in her veins in lieu of blood.]
Next time, you can just come with. Know how to play pool?
[Reaching into his pocket as his other foot finds the same degree of freedom, Kanda actually chuckles softly and drops several hundreds worth of joy chips on the bed beside him.]
Ran into Sion 'an we cleaned out some hustlers. You can use 'em for books.
[That should take some of the sting out of the inconvenience, right? Old books are a particular weakness of Lavi's, after all.]
no subject
The response that follows, however, produces a scowl. Just why is Kanda offering his (not so) hard-earned cash for Lavi's book collection? The man does nothing but complain all the live long day about his propensity to spend on books and writing materials.
So either he's developed a sudden streak of altruism and generosity (unlikely), or he's compensating for guilt. ]
No thanks. You can keep your dirty joy.
[ Why does he suddenly have an issue with being appeased? Why does the issue feel very similar to the spark of
possessionirritation that had risen when Kara called him to pick Yu up?Lavi shakes his head, pushing the thoughts away and standing. He crosses to the other side of the bed, batting lightly at Yu's side to indicate he should scoot over so Lavi can help him change shirts--
--which is about when he realizes the folly of this plan, mind summoning images of smooth muscle and sweeping planes, of ink etched into skin in artful swirls--
--and he swallows, hard, deciding it would be infinitely better to stay standing for this. Reaching down for the hem of Yu's shirt with one hand, he mutters lowly under his breath, impatiently motioning with his other hand. ]
C'mon, arms up. I wanna go back to bed.
no subject
[If there's a note of petulant affrontation in Kanda's voice, it's because Lavi actually sounds kind of...pissed.
Enough so, to give Kanda pause at any rate, to have him turning his head slowly, brows wrinkled slightly in confusion as he watches Lavi step closer to him--
--only to have all concerns with trying to figure his partner's irritation out scatter like grains of sand when Lavi takes hold of his shirt. He blinks once, slowly, gaze heavy-lidded as he stares at those fingertips curling under his shirt, mind ever-so-helpfully supplying the last time he'd been in his bed with Lavi's hands on him and--
Nope.
Not thinking about that now.
Instead, he closes his eyes and pushes up with a protesting groan, at the strange contrast of his head feeling like his heart is pulsing like a drum in there and the rest of him all too aware of proximity and the potential danger of touch.]
no subject
What's more miraculous than the lack of shaking is the remarkable ability to train his gaze on the wall as he does this. Such an interesting wall. Nice texture. Good floating.
(As he stands, however, he gets a glimpse of shadowed flesh, and the stillness of his hands breaks, wringing slightly inside the now claimed cloth.
Yeah, he's not even going to attempt getting Kanda to change fully. It's entirely too hard not to stare and follow the lines of muscle to the waistband of jeans.)
Turning to deposit the dirty shirt where it belongs (on the floor), Lavi disappears momentarily to fetch a clean one, muttering a soft command to Noah to kill the lights. This he tosses back in Kanda's direction before clearing the joy from the bed, his normal propensity for humor twinging--there's a good joke to be had here--but ultimately going ignored.
Then unceremoniously plopping down on the other side (his side of the bed), he turns his back to the drunk, entirely too hot idiot and rasps lowly. ]
Glad you had fun then. Goodnight.
[ He sounds 0% sincere. ]
no subject
So when the lights dim and the shirt hits Kanda in the face, he tosses it to the floor as well and lets himself fall back to the bed, far too tired to put forth the effort of finding arm holes and wrangling his hair enough to get another shirt back on.
Instead, it's much easier to start to nod off, eyes closing and darkness edging out awareness with a swiftness.
But then, that voice, sounding so cold once again.
Frowning, Kanda rolls to his side and in his infinitely drunken wisdom, slings an arm carelessly over his partner's side, palm splayed flat over the other man's chest.]
Don'be mad. Next time, we'll go... just us... mmm-hm... [And then a sleepy exhale as Kanda relaxed further into the closeness, nose and breath teasing softly against the nape of Lavi's neck even as sleep swiftly to claim him.]
/fin
Except that's not what Kanda does at all and the same reason he's bristling--the sudden sense of anxiety in proximity and the voiceless demand of touch--is brought to fruition. An arm around him and the heat of Yu's body pressed to his back, Lavi opens his mouth to growl a warning, to curse at the drunk idiot making life way too complicated for him..
And then shudders in the place of that, the warm wash of air on his neck sending a sharp jolt down his spine.
Yu says nothing more, and by the shift of breathing, he knows he's already fast asleep. Huffing faintly, Lavi considers rolling away or going to sleep somewhere else, but.. this isn't so bad. Distracting, yes, but comfortable, and how often does Yu sleep without norn these days?
Finally, no more certain as to why he does it than he understand why his nerves are so reactive, Lavi reaches up to the hand on his chest, curling his own around it and sighing. ]
Stupid bastard.
[ He sounds 100% sincere. ]