[ open ] as i walk through the streets of my new city

[kirkwalled]

Who: Hawkward Moment and Associates
Where: All over! Mostly Westerley
When: There's something terribly funny about typing "the last five years" here.
Summary: Previously on The Young and the Kirkwalled aka a pre-game catchall for Hawke!
Restrictions/Warnings: Some assortment of accident prone wrong (or right) doing and swearing here.

ONE | RAC

[ So, Hawke is a Level 3 RAC Agent. She very much has the ability to be higher than that and even the qualifications. She also, very clearly, does not want it. Level 3 allows her a cushy middle ground where she's not really expected of much and can be mostly left alone.

Let's not leave Hawke alone! ]

TWO | WESTERLEY

[ Hawke has a tiny studio apartment that doesn't even have a bed. She sleeps on the couch. She has the money to live better, sure, but she doesn't speak about it and doesn't like talking about it. She has a dog bed though, so at least her priorities are in order. Where is her dog right now? Kind of a mystery. The guy likes to roam.

Maybe you're her neighbor. Maybe you end up at the same bar as her a lot of the time. Maybe she did a job for you and helped find your lost cat. Hawke doesn't have a reason to be anywhere, she just always ends up there. ]

THREE | NETWORK

[ Please text Hawke. Send her memes. ]

FOUR | WILDCARD

[ Anything and everything is possible when you're a lone vagabond who doesn't know how to say no. Just, you know, don't ever ask her about Kirkwall. Here is her CR Meme link and if you want to hash out anything, hit me up via claptrap or any of the other options. ]

Comments

[kirkwalled]

Are you underestimating my ability to eat ass?

[ WHY IS THIS A TAG I'VE HAD TO SEND I ONLY JUST GOT IN THE GAME ]

[refactor]

[ Jack immediately regrets this conversation because. He's definitely probably sweating and I'm kinkshaming him for being so easy and he's stupid ]

uh

nnnnnnno? maybe? I don't know that's like not something you really advertise. usually?

see this is exactly why I was wondering if you were messing with me hawke

1/2

[kirkwalled]

[ You don't try to shame Hawke, Jack!! She'll just come back way too hard and it'll be embarrassing for everyone. Everyone that isn't Hawke, that is. ]

So I shouldn't be advertising my exceptional skill at booty eating? I wasn't quite aware. I thought, perhaps, if I used it as my work email it would be the first thing one might think of when they thought of me and my skill set. A foot in the door, as they say.

2/2

[kirkwalled]

The back door, that is.

[refactor]

okay well maybe you're the ass eating champion BUT I'm just throwing this out here but I can guess why you didn't get the job. because I mean it's not like you provided an alternate so I totally sent it. weirdly there was no comment. kinda disappointing? god people outside of westerley have such GIANT sticks up their asses I swear

anyways this is exactly why I don't hire you for like. infiltration jobs. btw

[kirkwalled]

Well, that's awfully disappointing. I can't help but feel a piece of me shatter at the realization.

Also, why not? I speak Leithian, you know.

[ No, it's just whatever they're speaking but with a snooty accent. Like Hawke's attempts to speak Orlesian. ]

[refactor]

I KNOW right??? like I'm 99.2% sure you're being sarcastic but I was so disappointed

ugh

also you don't speak leithian. stop telling people that

[kirkwalled]

I absolutely do speak Leithian. Why wouldn't I speak Leithian? Anyone can, Jack. I studied it and everything.

[ HON HON HON ]

[refactor]

putting on an accent does not count as speaking another language

[kirkwalled]

An accent! You disgrace me, Jack. It's as if you have no respect for the depth of my multicultural knowledge. I'm a world traveler and sometimes, in that, one picks up new skills.

Are you jealous?

[refactor]

no because AS USUAL you're totally full of shit

like where have you even been outside of the quad

[kirkwalled]

I'll have you know, there are plenty of places outside of the Quad full of rich, vast cultures that I have plunged for myself.

Where have YOU been outside of the Quad?

[refactor]

that wasn't an answer

[kirkwalled]

The answer is a lot. A lot. I'm not even FROM the Quad, remember??

[refactor]

well YEAH but you could have also just come straight from that place? and you're bullshitting me on the rest. that's something you would do

so yeah not believing you until I get names

[kirkwalled]

Have you heard of Ferelden?

Thedas?

Orlais?

I was once stationed in a place called Skyhold for a month, it was terrible and everyone wore pajamas.

[refactor]

...okay

will probably regret actually asking but whatever I like to live dangerously

why pajamas

[kirkwalled]

[ waaaait for it -- ]

I never asked.

[ yeah ]

[refactor]

what

how could you not ask? that would be question no1 hawke

[kirkwalled]

I think I was just happy to have a bed to sleep in and not, you know, dying in the recesses of space. The pajama thing was less a priority.

[refactor]

true but you still could have asked. I would have. you can be glad to not die and still be like dude what are you even wearing

[kirkwalled]

It just seemed really stupid. It was their thing and it was stupid so I just kinda ignored it after a while? Then I had to leave because their leader kind of wanted to sacrifice me a little. It was weird.

[refactor]

wait wait you've mentioned someone trying to kind of sacrifice you before. same guy or different one? guess either way that's too many times to run into someone wanting to sacrifice you but whatever

[kirkwalled]

Different time. It happens a lot and I'm actually quite tired of it.

[refactor]

solution's simple hawke

stop hanging out with people that will try and sacrifice you to I don't know their blood god or whatever

simple