[ Desperation, Lavi thinks, is among the most potentially dangerous aspects of the human condition. Desperation sees the start--and at times, the end--of wars, sees the thin coil of logic and rationality of an individual stripped and laid to waste. When people get desperate, they get stupid.
But even that's not the full picture, the full cause. Because desperation by itself is like any other state of being: it can be adapted to, accounted for. Given enough time, desperation can become a benign part of daily life.
It's the spark of hope, the node of potential, which turns the dregs of the desperate into tools of destruction. This is the combination that Kanda exudes to him: a man pushed to the razor's edge of his limit, but still burning with the faintest thread of hope for something better.
So Yu turns to norn, to a medicated lie for reprieve from demons, and Lavi...
Lets him, because he's not the person to intervene. Even if he wants to, he's outside of his jurisdiction. As a bookman. As a partner.
How can he raise his voice in protest against a solution when he has none of his own to offer? The best he can do is watch the tailspin as it happens, try to mitigate the damage where he can.
He owes Yu that much, at least.
Suppressing the pang of guilt in his gut, Lavi slinks through their ship, feels the faint rumble of the cargo bay doors closing before silence follows. Like a mausoleum, the halls fall into preternatural stillness, the faint brush of air moving through the vents a muted backdrop to careful steps.
He finds Yu leaning against their rover, the man's attention swallowed by the vial in his hands.
Hope locked inside glass walls, a contained seed of destruction.
Last chance to talk him out of it, then.
Book gripped by the spine between his fingers, Lavi raises a hand to wave and gather his partner's attention when a softly uttered question breaks the stillness of the hold.
"...The hells am I doing?"
Staring into the fuel that will soon raze the remnants of a broken mind, Lavi thinks.
As always, he says none of this, lowering his book-bound hand. Just a second to switch gears and turn on the charm, face brightening, smile spreading. He steps out of the hallway's shadow to summon Kanda's attention, tucking the tome under his elbow. ]
Yu! You're back quicker than I expected.
[ Laughter, light and easy, flows off his lips. His gaze tracks from the vial to his partner, but it's not judgment in his stare.
Just resignation, tainted with false warmth and sincere anxiety. ]
You didn't give Itsuki another head injury, did you?
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But even that's not the full picture, the full cause. Because desperation by itself is like any other state of being: it can be adapted to, accounted for. Given enough time, desperation can become a benign part of daily life.
It's the spark of hope, the node of potential, which turns the dregs of the desperate into tools of destruction. This is the combination that Kanda exudes to him: a man pushed to the razor's edge of his limit, but still burning with the faintest thread of hope for something better.
So Yu turns to norn, to a medicated lie for reprieve from demons, and Lavi...
Lets him, because he's not the person to intervene. Even if he wants to, he's outside of his jurisdiction. As a bookman. As a partner.
How can he raise his voice in protest against a solution when he has none of his own to offer? The best he can do is watch the tailspin as it happens, try to mitigate the damage where he can.
He owes Yu that much, at least.
Suppressing the pang of guilt in his gut, Lavi slinks through their ship, feels the faint rumble of the cargo bay doors closing before silence follows. Like a mausoleum, the halls fall into preternatural stillness, the faint brush of air moving through the vents a muted backdrop to careful steps.
He finds Yu leaning against their rover, the man's attention swallowed by the vial in his hands.
Hope locked inside glass walls, a contained seed of destruction.
Last chance to talk him out of it, then.
Book gripped by the spine between his fingers, Lavi raises a hand to wave and gather his partner's attention when a softly uttered question breaks the stillness of the hold.
"...The hells am I doing?"
Staring into the fuel that will soon raze the remnants of a broken mind, Lavi thinks.
As always, he says none of this, lowering his book-bound hand. Just a second to switch gears and turn on the charm, face brightening, smile spreading. He steps out of the hallway's shadow to summon Kanda's attention, tucking the tome under his elbow. ]
Yu! You're back quicker than I expected.
[ Laughter, light and easy, flows off his lips. His gaze tracks from the vial to his partner, but it's not judgment in his stare.
Just resignation, tainted with false warmth and sincere anxiety. ]
You didn't give Itsuki another head injury, did you?